Am I Dateable?

Do you have a checklist of qualities and physical attributes that you are looking for in a potential spouse? It's a common practice, but have you ever considered making a second list for yourself? If not, then you may not be ready to date. The Bible says in Song of Solomon 2:7 ESV, "I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases."

To be dateable, you should be able to bring value and contribution to someone else's life. You should be an asset, not a liability. This means finding your purpose, being content with being single, and having plans and visions for your life. Work on yourself before actively searching for a partner. Proverbs 19:2 ESV says, "Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way."

As children, we played games that focused on finding a partner, but they didn't prepare us for being ready for that person. The quest for an ideal partner starts with looking inward. You can work on your communication skills and make lists of desired characteristics, but until you are willing to work on yourself and become the person you hope to be, you may remain unsatisfied in any relationship.

When people ask about what you're looking for in a partner, consider asking yourself, "Am I being the person they are looking for?" It's time to clean house and focus on self-improvement. Ask yourself, "How can I make myself better? Am I complete or a work in progress? How can we make each other better, instead of how can he/she make me better?" Through prayer and self-improvement, you can become the person you want to find.

    Do you have a checklist of qualities and physical attributes that you are looking for in a potential spouse? It's a common practice, but have you ever considered making a second list for yourself? If not, then you may not be ready to date. The Bible says in Song of Solomon 2:7 ESV, "I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases."

To be dateable, you should be able to bring value and contribution to someone else's life. You should be an asset, not a liability. This means finding your purpose, being content with being single, and having plans and visions for your life. Work on yourself before actively searching for a partner. Proverbs 19:2 ESV says, "Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way."

As children, we played games that focused on finding a partner, but they didn't prepare us for being ready for that person. The quest for an ideal partner starts with looking inward. You can work on your communication skills and make lists of desired characteristics, but until you are willing to work on yourself and become the person you hope to be, you may remain unsatisfied in any relationship.

When people ask about what you're looking for in a partner, consider asking yourself, "Am I being the person they are looking for?" It's time to clean house and focus on self-improvement. Ask yourself, "How can I make myself better? Am I complete or a work in progress? How can we make each other better, instead of how can he/she make me better?" Through prayer and self-improvement, you can become the person you want to find.

rewrite There is an acceptance that you don’t need a partner to be complete. Your “other half” is NOT! Missing. Your life is not of any less value because you are not yet married. It’s in marriage; I have come to learn this. It’s dangerous to think your partner will complete you. If he/she falls short in “completing” any area of your life you expect, you will be greatly disappointed, and too much pressure is on the other person to make you happy. With prayer and faith you will become content with this stage of life, and come to recognize and accept that a partner is not needed to make you complete or even make you happy. You don’t just sit and wait on the Lord, and think that your life will begin after finding a spouse. Make yourself date-able by working on your career; work on your finances, start saving, get closer to God through studying His words. An advantage of being single is having more time to spend with the Lord, and to work full time in ministry

It's important to acknowledge that having a partner is not necessary for you to feel complete. You are a whole person on your own, and your value and worth do not depend on being married. This is something I've come to realize through my own experiences with marriage. It's dangerous to expect your partner to fill in all the gaps in your life and make you feel complete. If they fall short in any aspect, it can lead to disappointment, and it's unfair to put so much pressure on them to make you happy. By relying on prayer and faith, you can find contentment in this stage of life and recognize that a partner is not needed to make you feel complete or happy.

However, this doesn't mean that you should sit around and wait for a spouse to come into your life. You can make yourself more attractive to potential partners by working on your career, finances, and personal development. By taking these steps, you can become a more well-rounded and desirable partner. Additionally, being single gives you more time to spend with God and work on your spiritual growth, which can be a valuable asset in any relationship.